I'm going to start dropping knives. That's all I'm sayin'.

I went to my Granny D's for a little bit on New Years.  I worked a little bit of her puzzle.  I'm a nerd that's always enjoyed puzzles.  She also gave me THIS:

Yesssssssss.  I blogged about this little baby here, just in case you're new or if you've forgotten about this Aunt Jemima.  There's really no rhyme or reason to this thing.  She sits on an old milk can.  She holds a basket of fake bagels.  She's got big cotton boobs.  I don't get it but I love her. She looks really good in the corner of my kitchen.  Nobody puts baby in the corner.  Well, I do.  

I have a little collection of Aunt Jemimas going on in my kitchen.  I love them.

While at Granny's, I asked her if she knew of any other New Year superstitions other than the ones I shared in the previous post.  I said, "Granny, are there any others like not washing your clothes on New Years?"  She replied with an, "Oh no (Read: Ahh naww)!  I forgot all about it.  I worshed a load this mornin'."  Great.  My Granny just washed all her luck away for the coming year.
She told me that back in her day there was a superstition and wives tale for just about anything you did.  One that she told me about was:
"If you dropped a fork, a woman was coming to see you.  If you dropped a knife, a man was coming to see you.  If you dropped a spoon a baby was a comin'."
What I took away from that story was that I obviously need to start dropping a lot of knives in my house.  If only it were that easy.  Sigh.

Miss Independent

I have come to the conclusion that I might just be better off single. Really. When there is a potential guy that I'm interested in; I become one of "those" girls. I hate "those" girls. Obsessed, crazed, needy, jealous. The list could go on, but you get the picture. And what a sad and pathetic picture it is. I mean, I think it just naturally happens.
Right now I am 'Miss Independent'. I have my own house, I support myself, and I pretty much do what I want when I want. I don't have to ask or tell a significant other what's going on. I don't have to check in with anyone or feel guilty about not spending a certain amount of time with them. Sadly, though, when I was in relationships, I became very dependent on that other person. Too much so. The thought of that saddens me now. When my last relationship ended my cousin asked if I even remembered how to pump my own gas because the boyfriend would always take care of that for me. How sad is that?
I have always considered myself to be an independent girl. Growing up I never minded doing things alone. It's just my nature. It makes me wonder: Have I become too independent during these last few years of singledom to return to my old relationship ways? Living alone for so long has almost made me selfish. I cherish my alone time and enjoy my schedule as it is. I like the fact that I can lay around my house all night and do the things that I want to do; bad habits and all. The thought of giving some of that up is not completely appealing to me.

It's Been Awhile...

So, I am going to admit this sad little fact. I have now been single for 3 years and 7 months. Whoa! Has there ever been a girl in the world that has been single that long!?! Am I a record-holder? It is quite possible and actually admitting it makes me feel almost a bit embarrassed. So, what's my deal? Why single sooooo long? There are actually many reasons for my singleness.

1. My last break-up was bad. I was very sad. An engagement and my life as I knew it had abruptly ended. Not by my choice, I might add. I needed mucho time to heal and I needed to be ALONE. A lot of changes happened very quickly in my life. I lost my best friend and fiance. I was graduating from college. I was soon-to-be interviewing for my first teaching job. I had to search for a new place to live. I lost a lot of my friends that were "our" friends. A lot had to be sorted through and figured out. It took a lot of time. In a sense, I had to create a new "me" and start all over. It was hard. It's over though. Time has done its job and healed and I am totally and completely fine with it now. Sure, it's still a sad and low point in my life to think about, but I came through it and feel that I'm that much stronger and better for it.
About a year after my break-up I went on a "date". I thought I was ready, but as the night progressed, I knew that I wasn't. I ended up locking myself in the bathroom stall and had a good cry. I felt pathetic, but I knew that it just wasn't time for me to date again. Each person is different and I feel that you should allow yourself as much time as needed. You gots to take care of #1 first. That's the way I see it.

2. I am very picky about men. Now, my mother kindly reminded me the other day that I am no "raving beauty" so I shouldn't be so picky. Gee. Thanks for the support and major self-esteem boost. Nothing quite like hearing that. Yes, I am aware that I am not stunningly beautiful and a man's "ideal" woman by any stretch, but I do have standards. I set them high. I feel that I am worth that. My past relationships obviously didn't work out too well for me, so I have raised the bar a bit. Quite a bit. This is why I love my blog quote and relate to it so well. I'm just waiting on MY butterflies. I'd like to find someone that gives me "that" feeling.

3. I'm just not good with the whole dating scene. I guess I'm waiting for my Mr. Right to come knock on my door and we'll live happily ever after. I don't know. I'm just not good with putting myself out there and taking chances. I feel too vulnerable and am afraid of getting hurt again. I have trust issues, unfortunately.

The Single Life is, Well...Fabulous!

The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you you love, well, that’s just fabulous.

-Sex and the City

I recently finished watching all six seasons of Sex and the City plus the movie. When the show aired on HBO and was in its prime, there was so much hype surrounding it. I heard so many girls talking about how much they loved the show. First of all, I didn’t have HBO, so I couldn’t watch it that way. I had to wait until re-runs came to TBS. I caught a few shows here and there, but never quite understood the fascination in the appeal of this show. I just didn’t get it and didn’t think it related to me. Maybe I thought I didn’t relate to the characters, the big city life, the fabulousness that was their lives…blah, blah, blah.
Like I said, I recently finished viewing all six seasons. I guess that gives you an indication that I finally “got” the show. I fell in love with it, actually. After beginning Season One; I was hooked. I was sucked up into the fast-paced Manhattan life ready to follow the story lines of Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha. Maybe the fact that I am now in my mid-twenties (actually, I’m beginning to make the cross over into late-twenties..oh yikes) helped me to better like the show. Possibly it is the fact that I have been single for so, so, so long, enabled me to find similarities in myself and these characters. Who knows how this new love affair between myself and this show began. I’m just glad it began. I found these characters to be quite relateable and I wanted them to be my friends. Desperately.
In using the coined ‘word’ of the series, Sex and the City is truly ‘fabulous’. The show is so real and personal. The storylines are so creative and weave so seamlessly together to make for a wildly entertaining and relateable story. The writers of the show push the envelope a bit, but I feel that it is appreciated by the viewer, because it’s real stuff. It’s the stuff women really go through. Of course I’m not living in a great apartment in Manhattan, buying $400+ Monolo Blahniks (on a teacher’s salary–right!), and going out every night. I mean, dang. I don’t even have 3 close girlfriends to go out with. Sad. Yeah, that’s really sad. Let me know if you want to be my friend.
Despite all the blatantly obvious differences between me, the normal kindergarten teacher that resides in BG, and these four glamorous, gutsy, Manhattanites, there were still many ways that this show provided me with some normalcy. I’m a single gal and I have a life of my own outside of a man, like the characters on the show. It just reminded me that, hey, I’m okay. If these 30 and 40-something ladies can live the single life and flourish, so can I. The characters cherish the person they are. They know themselves, what they want, and they do what they love. They have careers and live independent lifes. They also cherish their friendships with each other and see each other as soulmates. How incredible it must be to have such a close-knit bond.
Episode after episode reminded me of who I am and who I want to be. I am comfortable in my shoes and am enjoying walking the single path in them. I cherish myself. I love myself. Most importantly, I have taken the time for me to get to KNOW myself. I know that I will some day find someone to share the fabulousness that is me, but for now I am happy and perfectly content with being in a relationship with me, and only me. I. am. fabulous.

Um, Is This It?

Tonight began yet another season of The Bachelorette. Jillian was introduced to 30 potential bachelors tonight. The guys were laying it on thick and givin’ it all they got. It was a bit pathetic. I mean, is it really necessary to freak out that much over the ‘first impression’ rose. Come on guys. Not necessary. Jillian seemed a little bored with her selection of males and the conversation. I was even more bored. Out of the 30 guys, there were 3 that I would have possibly been interested in getting to know. Yeah, 3, and because I’m shallow it was based on looks alone. Am I really that picky? Yes. I am.
Let’s just hope that this sad selection of bachelors does not indicate what is left in the dating pool in the great U.S. of A. If so, it makes me very sad. Guess I will continue on happily in my single ways.
I’m just sayin’.