These boots are made for falling and other randoms.

Don't let all the words in this post scare you. It's good stuff. Read on, children.

I tend to be a clumsy gal. I went out Saturday night and fell. Twice. Within a 30 minute period. In front of a lot of people. My falls weren't just little stumbles either. The first fall was a fall in full glory. I busted it. Legs came out from under me and I busted the ground with my butt. I blame it on my boots. My cowgirl boots are a little slick on the heel. Against certain types of flooring, mainly tile, they become a hazard. I should just know better than to wear them out, but they're so pretty, so it's worth it, right? I'll sacrifice a few seconds of embarrassment for wearing pretty shoes.
The second time I fell was on the dance floor. Ashley and I did a little butt bump, but I apparently wanted to keep the bump going. I passed it on to the floor.

Exhibit A

Today during free center time, I overheard a group of four of my girls talking. These girls are pretty tight. They all share a strong bond over a love for Justin Bieber. Baby, baby, baby, ohhh. He's their main conversation topic. I don't know what led them to this topic, but one girl shared with the others that her parents take showers together. This led to another girl sharing that her parents used to take showers together too...before her dad moved out. One of the other girls looked a little uncomfortable and said, "Let's not talk about this anymore." The other girl asked, "Why do your parents take a shower together?" At this point, they obviously felt me creeping and listening in to their conversation. They all turned and looked at me. I was then brought into the conversation and they asked me why parents take showers together. Crap. When my students ask me questions, I always try my best to give them educated and honest answers, but there are just some things that I can not and will not go into because their little kindergarten minds aren't ready. Discussing the reason why their parents take showers together is one of these instances. I quickly popped back with, "Um, because they want to save water." Yikes. Then I immediately followed up with my standard, "Let's talk about something else. This isn't appropriate to talk about at school." One of the girls said, "Okay, we won't talk about showers anymore." She kinda missed the part that was inappropriate. Now watch. They'll go home and tell their parents that I said it was good for parents to shower together because it's good for our environment. Let's hope I don't receive any notes tomorrow...
Let this be a lesson, parents. Kids watch everything and they WILL come to school and tell it. I know more than I want to know about a lot of families.

I feel so old sometimes. I probably act older than my 83 year old Granny. She's probably more hip than me. She drives a lime green Beetle after all. I embrace my oldness in my twenty-something body. The first thing I do when I get home is turn on my Mac Book and turn my heated blanket to high. Once I get my dog taken care of, I settle in on the couch for a night of TV watching and blog reading. It's so nice.
Some of you may think I'm about to reveal too much, but I don't censor or filter much. There's not much off limits with me, especially when it comes to gas release. Another example of me starting to feel old is that some of my gas expulsions are becoming harder to control. I've done several 'laughing farts' in the past week. You know, you're cracking up and have a fart squeak out. To me, it just makes me laugh even harder if that happens because, well, it's funny. Last week I did my first ever 'shh fart'. I was quieting down my class because they were off the hook. In mid "shh", one squeaked out. Luckily they didn't hear it because I was behind my desk showing something on the document camera. It was a close one though. Of course, immediately after it happened, I had to text Ashley, my BTF/love of my life best friend/next door classroom neighbor. I wrote, "Well. It's finally happened. In addition to the laughing fart I did this morning, I just farted while quieting my class. 'Shh (fart)'. Nice." Being the lovely friend that I appreciate, she opened my classroom door later in the afternoon and said, "Shh." Then made a fart noise with her mouth. Now that's a buddy.
Do I need to start taking Bean-o or something? Or is this just one of the perks I have to look forward to as I get older? What's the deal?

I'm kinda scared of Michelle on The Bachelor. She's like Regina George from Mean Girls. Beautiful but scary with a little touch of crazy. Her most intelligent quote of the night, in regards to repelling down the building: "I need to choose. Either I'm going to do this or I'm not going to do this." Um. Are there any other options, dear?

And what is it with Michelle's on The Bachelor? Remember this crazy?

Glad this week is started and that this Monday is winding down. It was a day. Shew.

Questions for you all:

1. Do you have uncontrollable farts? Laughing or Shh-ing ones?

2. What would you tell a 5 year old if they asked you why their parents take showers together? I feel like I need a good answer for this.

3. Does anybody else have an 83 year old Granny that drives a lime green Beetle? If so, let's get them together so they can be wild and crazy Granny friends together.